Tuesday, June 10, 2008

This Passion = My Pain

Before you start thinking weird stuff, this passion I'm talking about is my passion for driving.


Let me share this story from the start. That would be 31 May, I think. That's when I realised that my available credit of about $1k has disappeared. It occured to me that I've wasted good money on stupid expenses. It was time for me to take extreme measures. The biggest sponge of my $$ is of coz my car. The combination of petrol, ERP & parking charges. Thus I was VERY determined not to use it from then on.

My workplace is very near home. I didn't drive even though my co-worker said it doesn't take much petrol to travel such short distances. I actually walked and even carried my notebook all the way there. Seriously, 1km is no joke in the hot sun. I liked the fact that I've exercised and it's a healthier lifestyle!

I took free rides from others, MRT and bus! And you know what? I actually enjoyed it! First of all, I feel like I'm a student again. You know, that carefree feeling! Secondly, I enjoy the scenery & do my things. Finally, I don't have to deal with the stress of maneuvering the car in the traffic. Give me traffic jam anytime! I don't give a damn! Ha!

So since then, I've only driven three times out of practical needs. Nope, my skills/confidence didn't dispel. However, my road rage flared more often and indepth. On those three days, after I have reached home, I would feel constant pain in my chest. I made the conclusion that driving could be the culprit of these pains and might even be the root cause of my migraine. After all, my migraine started about the time I passed my driving test.

Nah, it's either nothing, as in it's only temporary. Or that it has more serious complications which I can't be bothered to find out. I rather die not knowing if that is the case. So no point seeing a doctor who will only refer me for further tests that would waste my time (and test my patience).

Anyway, my mum ridiculed me for the above saying since driving is my passion (taking up more than 60% of my salary), how can it be the cause of my problems? Well, I did mentioned to her that I hate driving now because of all the problems and headaches. It's true. I'm so much happier taking public transport. But a car is needed at times, like when I have to fetch a trolley full of groceries back. Also when I'm going to totally out of the way places (I took 138 to the zoo!) and fetching family around.

For now, I will continue to let my car rot in the carpark. I think I've already saved about $100 since that day. Isn't that cool? I'm even considering the option of downsizing/CNGing/weekending my car.

Ja!

Sunday, May 11, 2008

Shoujo Manga Addict

It's official. I'm seriously addicted to Shoujo Manga aka girls' love comics. I've started off with the Canadian ShojoBeat magazine which had extracts of a few manga titles. That wasn't enough. Then I tried to buy a sampler of manga books (one book each of three series). I love one particular one so much that I bought the whole collection (well, not that many, about 6 books total).

I'm crazy about Vampire Knight in ShojoBeat. So I am eagerly waiting for the June issue to reach Singapore (heard it's already out in US). Therefore I went Kinokuniya to check, only to be disappointed. So out of desperation, I bravely ventured into the Japanese section of the book store. All these while I didn't dare to because that section is always filled with Japaneses and I was too shy to intrude on their territory. Also I was afraid that if I start looking someone would talk to me in Jap.

Anyway, I quickly looked at the Manga Magazines shelve and WOW! They have so many different types of colourful, beautifully drawn manga! *Drooling* *Slurps back saliva* Candy store - phenomenon again. I was awe-strucked by the volume of each magazine. It has the average thickness of 3cm and area of an A4 size paper. That's simply humongous! This addict was tempted to buy all the available love comics. Luckily my diminishing credit limit won the usual buying battle (my bank account is probably saluting that). I only bought one miserable magazine which happened to be the cheapest one.

This is an expensive hobby.

Thursday, May 08, 2008

2008 Shape Run - CLOSED Registration

Sorry, gals.

Fully Registered already.

All 8,000 places snapped up within 2 weeks.
Think this time round, places are being taken up faster than the year before. *shocked*

http://www.shape.com.sg/shaperun08/registration.php

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Calling all Wakeboarding Kakis!

I'm considering a wakeboarding session the coming vesak holiday with Carolyn.

Anybody else interested? *SMS*

Should be taking the kallang one by Extreme Sports.

They do have sessions with instructors (most likely going for that).

So newbies and experts are both welcomed.

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Exercising Complains

My arms are still aching like mad. It was so bad that I woke up in the middle of the night in pain. They are like attachments to my body that I have little control over. I wonder if they have grown longer from being pulled by the boat. Maybe I look like a monkey now with super long arms hanging by my sides. Just swinging them around as I walk. *grin*

I was too ambitious also. I went jogging last night, thinking that the workout would help ease the aches. Instead it added on more strain to the already-torn muscle tissues. So, even though I was very inspired to run or play badminton at my workplace today, I did the smart thing (finally) by resting my body.

My body feels like it's swollen all over. My clothes even feel tighter. Is it cause of the expanded muscles or cause I'm simply too fat! Well, I will never know.

Anyway, this is the time to start my regular runs till the shape run event. Not training lah, just maintaining my stamina. I know I can never do long runs anyway. The longest I've ran on my own is around 1.5km. It's just keeping my body used to running so that I won't suffer on the actual day.

I'm super keen to go wakeboarding again. I'm just afraid of over-exerting my body cause I'm not that young anymore. But I'm craving for it. Haiz. Kakis kakis..??

Live Concerts? NLB@esplanade

The amazing treasure that the National Library Board @ esplanade has been hidding from us. Or maybe it's just me. Actually, someone has revealed it to me before. Just that I wasn't interested back then. Let me list some of those things. DVDs, VCDs, CDs, CD-ROMs, music scores, film scripts and theatre/film related books. It's like the DVD rental shop except it's FREE!! Well, actually you have a pay $21 for it's premium membership to borrow up to 4 AV items. But then now you have increased your borrowing quota to 8! Not bad, right?

I've been searching around the shops like mad for Japanese live concerts as mentioned before in my previous post. Like I said, not many available and they're either not the ones I want or they're too expensive (no lah, I'm too stingy to spend the $$$). So when I searched the NLB catalog and found some, I was so excited. So I went today & managed to find a few to borrow!

Sadly, I realised not all the singers give good live performances (not like Ken Hirai's anway). Got this Tackey & Tsubasa 2004 Spring Concert and was so disappointed. First of all, they're teen pop stars (maybe not so teeny anymore). I was hoping to see solid rocking performance, yet turned out they're so lacking in energy. Since they're singing those super fast pop songs, I guess it must be tiring. Cause majority of their songs are not sung live! Well, Tsubasa has the kind of voice I like but he's like so uninterested in performing. When they did sing live, it's nothing impressive at all. Maybe they're just lacking in confidence.

Then I watched BoA's Live tour 2004 Love & Honesty and it gave me a bit more hope that there are some good ones out there. She was full of confidence and gave her best. Smiles and stares unwavering at the audience. Guess the eye contact makes a lot of difference. At least, I enjoyed it much more than the Tackey & Tsubasa's one. Again, guess it's due to the energy-sucking dance steps, quite a number of songs were lip-sync. However, those live songs were done rather well, cause she has good control of her voice and it's powerful enough to be projected well.

So now, I'm left with the Ayumi Hamasaki's one. Will update again. Since she's a really experienced performer, I except it to be better than the previous two. But I've seen her live performance of 'Dream' on 'Music Station' before and she went off key on the high notes. Erm.. well maybe I should just lower down my standard.

I'm sure however, I can count on a few Japanese artists to do well. The MTV unplugged one by Utada Hikaru will definitely be good (even though her voice a bit soft at times). Also, Namie Amuro's Live is good because of her dance steps (though she's another cool faced performer) and she's singing live majority of the times. Amazing stamina for a singer! Then I can always trust Ken Hirai to give the best of best live songs!

Yup all those borrowed from the NLB@esplanade. I think I've borrowed enough today to make up for that $21 premium membership fee :)

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Introduction to Wakeboarding!

YES! I DID IT! My first wakeboarding experience! Yipee!

I signed up for this course at CSClub which roped in Extreme Sports. Paid only $55 for more than 3hrs shared with another 4 gals. The instructor was very good and encouraging. He didn't force us to get the techniques right, instead focused on the thrill & enjoyment of flying on water!

Also, they were flexible enough to let us get on the boat to watch a professional demonstrate. His name is Roger, apparently very famous in the Wakeboarding scene. Wahlau! I can't believe how lucky I am to be able to watch a pro do the stunts right infront of me. I was sitting right at the end of the boat (almost as good as roller coaster ride) and stupidly I fell backwards when they stopped the boat abruptly. So malu (read: embarrassing).

Well, I had 2 slots of water-time. Both times, I kept falling but once I got it right, I was flying all the way through to the end. Wah, damn shiok (read: enjoyable). It reminds me of riding on a bike. They're all called riders anyway so haha..you see the link lah. I love riding the water! No chance to learn how to ride the waves yet. Fell flat when I couldn't maintain over the waves. Then my water-time was over (*SOB*).

This is what I've been missing out on! Goodness, if only I had the opportunity to try much earlier. I'm super thankful I noticed this course by CSClub. Anyway this instructor, Hardi, is really patient and yet was able to spot your exact error and correct it. Do ask for him if you want to sign up. They are providing it for $150 for 4 lessons package. Sounds like a good deal. Click the link below for more details.
http://www.extreme.com.sg/

P/S: Sorry, as I went for the course alone, I've no one to take photos of me (I didn't bring my camera also lah). Wish I had. Aiya, nevermind, next time. :) Yes, Carolyn is right, I'm aching all over today haha.. But they're good aches, cause I love to know I've put my body through the stresses from Sports! The adrenaline! Wahlau Shiok! I'm addicted to another hobby! Oh! I also discovered I'm a left-footer, maybe cause from using it more when I played the electronic organ and also using the clutch pedal for 2 yrs.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

2008 Shape Run Singapore

The 2008 Shape Run is happening in July!
Registration starts 26 April 2008. So do sign up!

Please go to this website for more details:
http://www.shape.com.sg/shaperun/
I'm definitely signing up!


UPDATES:
I've signed up the moment it was past midnight (aka 00hrs on 26 Apr).
I'm no 322! hee.. Talking about KiaSu :)

Locked Blog

Blogger is saying that i have a spamming blog???



What? First time. I'm confused. How do i spam my blog?



haha..anyway.. hope for a fast review & revive my blog..



Else be deleted in 20 days..wahlau..

1 day later. Thank goodness it's been unlocked..

Now better not link photos to original sites ..just incase..still not sure if that was the problem.

Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Japanese Music, Manga & Anime

I was shopping one day and entered a CD shop that sold all sorts of disc items. With my recent interest in animes, I searched the Japanese section and chanced upon an old DVD of Ken Hirai that marked his 10th year in the music industry in 2005. Since it was cheap and I liked some of his songs, I bought it. Actually I've seen his performance in 'Music Station', the Japanese music variety show and was impressed with his live performance.

It is so darn great! His voice control is good and had great showmanship. It's enjoyable to watch him perform. I actually felt as if I was there in audience itself. WOW, it's so moving and his singing is so mesmerising. The Japanese are really into music cause their song production is so great and the audience is always so supportive and raving all the way through til the end.

Now I think I'm addicted to Japanese Live performances. It's a matter of finding them. I tried a few shops but they all had the same boring old titles. Nothing much to choose from. I wonder if there is any place in Singapore where I can have a better selection.

Anyway, I've watched quite a few animes. I'm going to list those I've watched here:
Bleach

Naruto

D.Gray Man

Fullmetal Alchemist

Those are the 'Shonen' (manga for boys). As the first 3 animes listed are still on going in Japan, I've no choice but to wait. However, I'm the kind of person who hates waiting. So I bought the manga magazines, hoping to catch the latest chapter.
Sadly, the English verion (made in Canada) is always way behind the Japanese ones. So instead of satisfying my urge to find out the latest, I've gotten myself addicted to some more manga/animes. Well, maybe cause I also bought the 'Shojo' manga which is manga for girls.
Now I'm into the 'neoromance' manga, Shojo manga created by female, usually about a heroine surrounded by loads of handsome looking males. Wah.. reminds me of 'Meteor Garden' which I've watched back in 2000 on cable. That's an old neoromance manga which was made into anime. Then later on the Taiwan's drama version and then the Japanese one much later on. Some of the Shojo animes which are currently aired on the 'Animax' channel on our Starhub cable are 'Honey & Clover' and 'La Corda'.

Haiz, I'm still not desperate enough to want to read the Chinese manga of those animes I'm following. (Those are more up to date.) So I'm trying to keep myself busy with learning how to draw manga now. Only drawing the handsome, cool male characters. I'm not good, only can copy existing pictures. However, I am picking up the basic of manga drawing from doing those. Samples of my copied manga: (The first two are from a manga drawing book and the 3rd one is my first attempt on copying from an actual manga.)


As usual, work is busy. I'm still preoccupied with marking and planning things. Nothing much to say about that. Not in blogs anyway. :)

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

150th Post!

I've been slow in updating my blog for various reasons. Since workplace is closing early this year, I've been doing overtime at mac with my good friend roza almost everyday. After that I'm so drained that I have no inspiration to blog at all. Today is the worst day of all cause I'm having stomach-flu symptoms and I'm still pushing it to the max with work.

I've missed the PL gathering last friday to finish my work. I've failed all my 2008 resolutions. For once, I've been the opposite of zen-like. I've flared up a few times and I'm pissed off with some people who are giving me a hard time at work. I've not done anything related to water (not even swimming). I've not even signed up for any language courses yet. I've failed terribly.

I was down with fever and taken MC just a week ago. I do not wish to take MC again but I may have no choice this time. I think I'm down with some bug. It's irritating to have this happening now. I don't have the time for this.

It doesn't help that I've the most challenging project ever. I'm suffering the consequences of trying so hard to upgrade it to my last year's standard.

I've been hearing some sickening rumours from this toxic friend. So to sum it up, it's a bad year to take on extra responsibilities with all these things happening.

Stress level is at its highest and everyone has lost their smiles. I've heard a few people talking about resigning. I've even looked at job advertistments. That's how bad it is right now.

It's a tough struggle to stay happy and positive about things. I know it's good and I kinda enjoyed it at first but it doesn't help to have those negative people around. It makes me feel really down about it all.

I'm just glad at least there is a friend who's been injecting some laughter into all these. Thank God for that.

Monday, February 11, 2008

Backdated Blog - 30 November 2007

Though I’m feeling pretty carefree recently and seem to be happy at work. There are times when certain songs, scent or scenes that will still invoked in a me a sense of nostalgia about the past. Most of all it hits me like a stab in my heart, a sudden craving to be back in those days when we were blissfully in each other’s company. My heart crunches and I had a sudden need to end my torturous exsistence. I’m glad I’m in school. There are many colleagues around. Just knowing that they are there is enough to feed this aching heart.

Usually at this time of the year, we would’ve already booked a trip to Genting Highland and Kuala Lumpur. I would most likely be anticipating arrival of the holidays. Such a drastic difference that I now wish school will not end so quickly. I want to occupy my time with work and not have time to think about things. I fear the days when I will have to think hard about what I could do in Singapore and shield myself from the temptation of driving up Malaysia.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Beyond 3 Oh

Reflecting on my days since turning 3-0, I do see some significant events happening.

(1) I ended my revived relationship.

(2) I finally woke up from my job to a career.

(3) Found out that a ex-suitor who's perfect gentleman is married.

(4) My first BF is still attached to the reason he broke up with me.

(5) Discovered I'm better off being single.

A little elaboration of each of the above...

(1) An ex-bf i shouldn't have had a relationship was attached to me for more than 2 years. A silly mistake, i realised. Stupid to have even have faith in him or even believed his obivious lies. All the while believing that he has a good heart and won't hurt me emotionally.

(2) Finally not treating my work as a job. Doing something to work on climbing the ladder. It's the foremost thing on my mind at all times now.

(3) An ex-suitor who wrote me the most touching letter that i've ever received in my whole life, is now married. I still remember my mum's words about letting him go and find the right gal if i'm not interested. Well, it happened. Should i praise myself? or lament that I gave up a good chance? Just another minestone in my life.

(4) My very first bf has probably married her long time ago and is still happily married to her. How did a schemeing woman get him? Well, maybe that's just what guys want. A manipulative woman.

(5) I should probably ignore all of the above except for the one about my job. I realised that i like being myself and not having to deal with all the crap with another person. So what's happening to all my exes shouldn't matter anyway.

My current time fillers??

Anime/TV, work and sleep.

Sometimes i find that life is playing some joke on me at this point in time. So i guess it's worth blogging about.

Sunday, January 27, 2008

2008 Chinatown

For the first time ever in my life, I went to Chinatown with my parents to join the crowds viewing the Chinese New Year sales. It's so much more meaningful than going with friends because we were there with the intention of shopping for items for home, not just to walk around. We bought quite a number of stuff. Infact we were quite smart to head there early and still had time to drop by NTUC supermarket to do more shopping.

What's a pity is that I didn't have the foresight to bring along my camera to capture the wonderful decorations that they had put up there. For example, the Budda's Tooth Relic Temple dimmed their lights but filled up their foyer's ceiling with lots of lanterns. It was a wonderful sight. Plus the mood everyone was in should've been recorded! Anyway, I guess it doesn't really matter cause this will forever be etched in my memory.

Friday, January 18, 2008

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Sunday, December 23, 2007

She's Not On Vacation Leave Meh???

That's the question my sister asked my mum. Cause she will wake up the few days she's in Singapore, to find me gone. Gone where? Gone to work lah.

I'm fortunate to be working with my neighbour co-worker, Roza (who's sitting next to me). Making plans to meet to discuss work has inspired me to go head there in the morning. There are a few projects we're working on together. So the time we set aside to work never seem to be enough and somehow end up meeting quite often.

I've been staying daily from 9 til 5, majority of the days, coz of other things also. Like my own projects that i'm still busy working on. So it's been a busy month. Which is also good lah. Else i will be bored to death at home. Or thinking up activities to do. Bad thing is that i'm missing out on all the sports that i usually would do during the holidays.

Which leads to what i've been wondering for the past few days: How do the bosses do it? I'm amazed that they, who have more responsibilities and projects to complete, can afford to finish their work and not head to work during vacation time. Whereas workers like me are staying daily to rush finish the work.

Guess that only mean one thing. That i will only qualify to head that position once i figure it all out. So my goal for 2008 is to be zen-like in my dealings to people at work and to be able to work smart and finish work quickly without compromising the quality.

At least i did some adventurous sports like my skiing in korea and windsurfing. Those few sessions have strengthened my muscles, which i previously didn't noe i have. Haha.. Now i do realise that strength/weight training is indeed very good at toning and weight lost. Those few sessions is equal to many sessions of my usual cardio workouts. Can you imagine i'm still eating as much as i did in korea and still have muscles to boast about(well.. hidden under my fats anyway..hee..).

By the way, Korea is so breath-taking that i can't find the words to describe it. Maybe cause it's the only country i've been to other than those typical Asia places. It's more amazing than Australia(which i backpacked in for 1.5 months) because of the ski resorts and the Japanese-like SPA/bath places that they have. I can imagine Japan being the same or even better. So once i get inspiration enough, i will plan one trip to Japan.

You can find my Korea trip photos either in FaceBook(a few selections) or Sabby's Album (the whole thing which will be upload later on).

Of course, since i like the people and scenery in Korea so much, i plan to make a solo free & easy trip back there. I've realised that i rather travel by myself, rent car and explore different places. So while i was in Korea, i kind of familiarised myself (mentally) with the roads there. Took photos and notes of places that i would need to know or want to visit. This so that i can go back there and travel by myself confidently.

Korea is rather safe and secure, either as good as Singapore or even better. Drivers are many times better than Singaporean in many ways. They are courteous, considerate, safe and yet skillful. They are able to speed or at least travel harmously without causing obstruction to any other road users.

In Korea, it's so hard to find 'turtle'-drivers who are crawling at the fastest lane or purposely blocking others. Yet these speedsters are able to give way to others when they see a faster vehicle. They give way to road users who need to cut across them. I'm so impressed that a good 10% of my photos are of roads & cars.

The country is also very clean! They have recycle bins EVERYWHERE! And it's not for show!! The locals actually are very conscientious about putting their trash in the right places. Thus the country is so much more cleaner than Singapore! They also make a very serious habit out of returning all plates & cups after they makan. How i wish we could somehow instill this in our new generation.

However, the only problem that i have with visiting this country alone is that i have a language barrier. haha.. Yes i do know some basic korean words & totally at ease with names of places but can't really speak or understand the beautiful language well. So i must make sure that in 2008/2009 i must go learn Korean til i'm able to converse and read confidently. I need to know how to read for easier understanding of warnings, although all major road signs do include the english versions of places' names. However parking rates and minor warning signs are only available in Korean.

So already i have my New Year resolution for 2008:
1) Work smart.
2) Learn Korean at a language school.
3) (Optional) Lookout for my SOULMATE.
4) Obtain Sailing Level 1 certificate.
5) Obtain Windsurfing Level 1 certificate.

Don't you think 5 is already a handful? Okay, think i will not be too ambitious and just stop at that.

Finally....HAVE A BLESSED & MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Sunday, November 18, 2007

Oct-Nov Updates

Going korea this month end with my parents. Mostly motivated by the korean dramas i've been watching & secretly wanted to meet my handsome korean dreamlover there. Funny right? Subconciously okay. Then since the package included skiing (actually i wanted a skiing package), i asked around to find out what to do to prepare for skiing. Bladding was the answer. Thus i bravely ventured into that again.

After so many attempts over many years, i somehow didn't start out too badly. In fact, managed to move quite a distance by myself without support (but REALLY SLOWLY...). However, my determination to accomplish this sport came at a price. No, i didn't fall at all. I was concentrating so hard to moving and completing the distance, that i didn't realised that the skates were cutting into my skin.

(Warning: what follows may gross you out.) There was a horizontal cut that went round half my calf. No blood, but i can only see white flesh left from the abrasion. My dark upper layer of skin was already all gone. I was surprised cause i didn't feel any pain at all. What's even more amazing is that i continued to run/jog around east coast with my colleague.

So the consequences? Rotting flesh that was still bleeding after 3 days. My mom took about 2 days to convince me to allow her to put the 'Yunan' aka China's melon powder on it. Well, even though i totally didn't believe that but it TRUELY worked! The wound dried up within the day itself & totally didn't 'burn' at all. Do use that next time alright. Compared to my previous similar injury, this really healed so much faster!

Reflecting on this year, it's been an amazing journey. Loads of changes of the way i look at things & mostly the way i work. I enjoyed it so much better because i'm most of myself now, instead of trying to be perfectly safe & subdued. My boss even commented on my performance this year.

First of all, she said there were quite a number of nominations for me as an outstanding staff, which totally knocked me speechless. She apologised she couldn't choose me but i told her i am delighted by the fact that i've been nominated. I won't even think about getting choosen cause there are so many more deserving people. Then she mentioned that i was ranked rather high this year. Another shocker. I was worried i might be at the bottom and here she is telling me i'm at the top. Wow! Double whamy!

You know how when you achieved something or experienced something wonderful and totally out of the world, you can't wait to share it with your loved ones? Well, that's the something that's lacking in my life. I've shared with my parents. Somehow that's different. So many times i hear some songs and i'm so blissful about how my life is going. Yet, in all that happiness i feel, i had to remind myself this: I do not need someone to share it with.

Such is my life at the moment. Totally on cloud9, yet void of that one thing.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Gohae 3 - Another Translation from Drama sub

A much proper translation that made sense out of the whole song. The previous one is a raw/direct translation. This is much better for understanding but it's not as feeling as before. Maybe cause i'm used to the old translation and now there's a line missing in the verse cause it's been blended together.

Anyway, it so bloody hard to find the MP3. After many attempts at many websites & clients, i still can't find Chi Yeol's cover. Only managed to get one miserable low quality original singer's version.

Also, i found the actual romanised of the title should be kobae but so far only found Gohae on sites. So i guess it is the actual name to me for now.

Infact, i'm typing as i watch the 'Lovers' drama on Starhub Cable channel 255 (+3hrs broadcast). If you've missed it, don't worry. They will repeat this double episode of 9 & 10 again tomorrow or next week. I can't remember which. You can always check the Cable guide. If i'm not wrong, they will repeat it twice.

Also, i didn't have the chance to explain in the last post. Yes, the chorus is a cry of help to God. The singer sang it like a cry to heaven. It's so sad. Digs right into your heart's hurt & pain, that is, if you have. It can be used to express the feelings towards the guys as well just change the pronouns.

Confession
고해 告解(苦海) - 치열(Chi Yeol)

What happens now?
What should I do?
I fell in love with her
Yet I lie to myself
Pretending to have forgotten her
This is worse than death

The world reprimands me
And sees me as crazy
I worry for the unavoidable
But I still love her

Chorus:
Lord, where are you?
Can you hear me?
A love so painful and sad
Do you understand?

Please forgive me
I'll take any punishment
Please don't let it be her
Please let us be together
(repeat chorus)

Okay time for MY confession: Yes, I'm crazy about this 'Lovers' drama. To the point that i won't mind watching all the repeats available on cable and yet it's still not enough. I will watch it again & again.

You noticed that i mentioned my 'boyfriend' Lee Seo Jin? haha.. Cause i'm crazy about him being so 'man'/gangster type so protective of his love. I want a gangster boyfriend! My 'neighbour' worker mentioned it once and that term has been stucked with me ever since. That 'boyfriend' term is now used loosely to refer to whichever actor i'm crazy about at that moment in time.

Thursday, November 08, 2007

Gohae 2 - History & Explaination

Just discovered many korean dramas are using the song for super important, romantic, crucial part of their plot. Thus it must be a damn great song. There are two main singers who have sung it on records. Others have too but not recorded.

The English translation for the title is Confession.

It roughly expresses the feeling of a guy wanting to confess to a girl his true feelings but it's wrong to love her. He is hopeful that she will accept his love through his confession. Its a really heart-wrenching kind of feeling because he has to hide his feelings but wants so much to confess them all to her. I realised for two dramas, they were used at the point where the lead actors had to hide their feelings. So suiting.
(The above is my own translation from the few dramas i've seen before.)




Direct Translation of Song:


What happens now
What should I do now?
Fearlessly, without hesitatation,
I love her

Quietly even I, even i don't know
Pretending i've forgotten
Even i live, i die
I love her

Even the world's condemnation
Even this crazed appearance
Even knowing all this,
Even though it frightens me.
I love you

Chorus:
Where are you?
Can you really hear my words?
Then, this blood that spills from my pitiful love
You must know this too

(repeat)
Please forgive me
If you punish me, I'll accept it
But her, just this one person,
Please allow our love

Reference Drama:
(1) Started to get my attention from episode 10 of 'Lovers' (2006) where my gangster 'bf' Lee Seo Jin acted in. The song was played at the part where he first/finally acknowledged and acted upon his feelings for his love. He can't love her because his girlfriend whom he's about to marry is pregnant with his child. (p/s: Both the leads are dating for real and there's possibly a wedding this year end too.) Also, it's showing now on our local cable channel 55/255 on weekends. this weekend should be the one where they will show this scene.

(2) Then found the young baseball player lover from '9 ends 2 outs' (2007), sang it in a karoke scene. He sang it so beautifully cause he's a singer in real life. Can almost fight with the original singers.

(3) Finally my current boy toy 'bf' Gong Yoo sang it in episode 14 of 'One Fine Day' (2006) while drinking in pub pitifully. Since he's the 'brother' of his love, he went through such pain thinking about what to do with this wrong love. The song truely showed his feelings at that moment in time.

I'm sure the above dramas are not the only ones that featured this song, Gohae. Infact when i googled it, i found a few more scenes where the actors sang it. That's excluding those where it was just played in the background.

Anyway, this song captured my heart everytime i hear it. I've only made the connection after i saw the drama '9 ends 2 outs' and found out that they were the same song.

In that drama '9 ends 2 outs', the actress watched the japanese movie, 'love letter', in korean language. Gohae was playing in the back ground when the actress shouting out very sorrowfully, her love confession to the snow-filled land.

Coincidentally, that is the same movie scene that was shown in Guang Yang's 'Tong Hua' MTV. It appeared on the TV of the scene where the girl with cancer watched with Guang Yang and cried.

So amazing, right? If you interested now, do watch the 'Lovers' version of Gohae.
(Or you can simply scroll down to my previous post on Gohae.)

That's how obesssed i am recently with korean dramas & in particular this song. I'm even writing down korean conversational words.

I've just discovered another popular song that's appeared in many dramas. I will be investigating and update when i find it.

More to come when i discover any more interesting facts of korean dramas!